No cis men
no cis men, says the sign on the door and i read, prove yourself are you woman enough to enter this building not woman like dresses but woman like a body you didn’t get for free the feeling that these spaces want to spit us out like we won’t be safe from the pain of judgement because it follows us in and comes out through their eyes
do you see me? do you see what I am trying to do? who i am, and what i am am i more to you than a token or just a tragic figure am i someone you could fuck someone you could fall in love with can i come to your party and feel at home?
they check my id and find the F the sign they look for to say “you’re good” but i see the glint of doubt in your eyes when i say thanks and my voice sounds just a little too deep the foot to head look they give doesn’t read as checking me out so much as vetting my existence i feel a shiver of fear, and swallow it down
i dance and flirt as armor against the other this belonging feels like a battle and i am not one to give up easy